I never in my wildest dreams thought that I would be a stay at home mother. I honestly never thought I would have kids. I would describe myself as 'not compatible with children'.
This is not to say that I don't love my children, because I do very much. Becoming a mother opened my eyes to the fact that I am actually, 'not an other people's kid' person.
It has nothing to do with the other's children, it's me. I don't know how to interact with children very well. I am the youngest with an eight year gap between us and I'm in the youngest batch of grandkids on both sides of my family. I was never really around babies or children unless I was one.
When I had my son in 2018, it really hit me that I knew nothing about taking care of a child. Luckily, I have a wonderful mother and great mother-in-love. My mom stayed with me for awhile after giving birth just to show me the ropes.
I. Was. Terrified.
I was 26 and barely taking care myself but, that little boy opened me up to a whole new world of adventure. Taking care of my baby was fairly easy giving that we were blessed and he was healthy.
Before having children I thought taking care of another life that was 100% dependent on me would be impossible. That was a big reason on why I didn't want to have kids, that and I was being selfish with my time. Doing things that didn't matter or better myself any way.
My fears almost stopped me from the greatest thing that has happened to me, which is being a mother. My advice to people who think that they can't do it, chances are you can and you're managing your time incorrectly.
For people who don't think they are in a good spot financially, most likely you will never be as financially stable as you want be before kids. My husband and I bought a house and brand new car - then found out that we pregnant after over a year of trying.
God works in His own time. This is something that I have to remind myself often. Kids bring out something in their parents, the want to do better - be better. I started this blog and my husband works extra hard at his job to make sure that we have everything we need.
Looking back, going through college I thought I was grown. Making my own money, paying rent and bills but, in reality I don't think a person can truly grow up until they have a human life that truly depends on them for everything.
I'm glad that I decided to have children, I can't imagine my life without them. Getting to see them start new things and learn about the world around them. Simply amazing. I would encourage you, have kids - take this amazing adventure by the horns.
I can't wait to see who they will be when they grow up.
